I was really dreading this one, but since I’m going to be absent for the next couple of days, I’m going to be reviewing yet another TNA PPV, and here it is Final Resolution 2008.
Cute Kip, Sonjay Dutt, Some Dude From The Motor City Machine Guns, BG James, Jay Lethal, Consequences Creeds, Curry Man, Hernandez, Homicide, Shark Boy wrestled in a Fest or Fired match.
This match sucks. I hate the gimmick, I hate how people are just fighting each other for the briefcases. Last year, they had this and it was so lame and so convoluted, and made me hate wrestling in a lot of ways. My favorite part of the match was the Curry Man moves. It seemed like everyone got to hit their favorite spot, including LAX. Hernandez was launching people out of the ring like hot potatoes! It was kind of cool. There was just too much going on for my tastes. Curry Man gets case #3 and then dives onto the floor with NO ONE to catch him! Homicide got briefcase #1! Honestly, some of these mid carders are no no name wrestlers to me, I have no idea who some of them are. I know some of them…most of them? I don’t know. Some of these guys haven’t been on Impact in a while. Jay Lethal jumped in and took a briefcase, briefcase #2! The Motor City Machine Guns were left standing in the ring, without a case and they were upset that Jay Lethal jacked them for the case. This is the most convoluted match in the history of professional wrestling.
Curry Man pulled Case #3
Homicide pulled Case #4
Jay Lethal pulled case #2
Hernandez pulled case #1
One case was going to be opened tonight, and that case was number 2 so Jay Lethal opened his briefcase revealing: Jay Lethal will receive a tag team title shot! WTF? This is so stupid, so convoluted, I hate this match, FIRE ALL THE TNA WRITERS!
ODB, Roxxi, and Taylor Wilde defeated Sharmell and The Beautiful People
The knockouts were on point as usual. I could see a ppv dedicated to the woman’s championsip, as these girls really put it all out there. They are better wrestlers than lookers, that’s for sure, however the beautiful people do have that porno starlet quality to them. Whatever the case is, these chicks got it going on. They can wrestle really well, and I enjoyed this match, and if you’ve seen the impact matches featuring these women, you’ll have enjoyed this one. It’s longer than impact, and they really o a good job. I really liked Roxxi in this match up, she showed she can wrestle and be extreme and her tag team maneuvers with Taylor Wilde really proved to be a great and unique way to use them together. Sharmell wasn’t in there for a lot of the match, and you could tell she was scared as ODB was tagged in. Sharmell finally got tagged in and ODB was ready to kill her but Cute Kip interfered and ODB cased Sharmell straight to the back of the arena. Taylor Wilde picked up the win for her team with a cross body block off the top rope!
Eric Young defeated Sheik Abdul Bashir for the x-division championship
The X-Division title match was on the line in this one. First things first, he ref that screwed things up the last time is once again here, and this is lame. However, the two put on a half way decent match up. WWE could take notes on this, as the cruiserweights can really put on some good classic wrestling if they are given some time to wrestle. Bashir did put in a lot of rest holds, but overall, he made it look good with Eric Young putting in some great counter moves. Eric Young’s top rope elbow drop was amazing! Picture perfect, and nearly like the classic Macho Man elbow drops that I remembered as a kid. Lots of near falls followed with neither opponent getting an edge over the other. Eric Young wins this one and the x-division title!
Post match, Bashir attacked the ref and that prompted the ref to go nuts again. The ref got busted wide open and was wobbly during this one, and Bashir really beat the hell out of him! I can’t believe no one came to the rescue of the ref, who was really paying for any previous encounters he might have had with Bashir.
Christy Hemme defeated Awesome Kong via disqualification
This match has been boiling for a while, but I was under the impression that Hemme had a battle with the beautiful people? Maybe not; this match was for the knockouts title, it was definitely better than any divas match I’ve seen this year. Hemme was fearless in this match, jumping off the top rope onto kong, and really giving Kong a run for her money. Hemme had this sewn up for the win but Raesha Saeed pulled Hemme out of the ring during her pin attempt, then Rhaka Khan was out there trying to fight her, and Hemme basically was fighting three women to try and win this match up against Awesome Kong. Kong went nuts and threw the referee down, and then went on to beat th living crap out of Hemme, until TNA officials came running in and separated the two knockouts.
Beer Money Inc defeated Matt Morgan & Abyss
The tag team championship titles were on the line for this match up and things could get very good for Matt Morgan and Abyss, but I had my doubts going into this match up. Matt Morgan and Abyss were looking way too dominant for Beer Money and Beer Money was nearly walking out of the match up, and of course like in all ppv matches the stipulations changed and if they lost the match via count out they would lose the titles. So they were forced to come back. Beer Money turned things back around again, and they were looking like the champs as they systematically tried to dissect Matt Morgan working over his limbs with ease. That is until Morgan got his second wind, and Abyss got tagged in! He was cleaning house with every single big move he has in his arsenal. But the guys in beer money gave him a good match up. Abyss stole the beer bottle from Beer Money and was ready to strike, but was distracted long enough for one of the members of Beer Money to grab some brass knuckles and knock out abyss! Beer Money keeps their titles with one of the oldest tricks in the book! FINALLY a GOOD tag team! Beer Money is a perfect example of a good tag team in modern day professional wrestling.
Suicide made his in ring debut. Full mask and body covered. He beat up the motor city machine guns, and just annihilated both of them. I don’t know who Suicide is, but everyone I’ve spoken to have claimed that it is Christopher Daniels, I’m not sure who he is really…nor do I even care. It wasn’t a match, he just jumped in and beat people up.
Kurt Angle defeated Rhino
Mick Foley was the special guest enforcer
This to me was just delaying the inevitable meeting between Kurt Angle and Jeff Jarrett. You knew it was coming and it was just TNA’s way of getting Rhino involved with the ppv. Kurt Angle was once again beating his opponent out of the ring and made sure to get in a lot of spots. Meanwhile, Foley was trying to give tips to Rhino whenever Angle was out of the way. Angle was way too confident with his rear naked choke as he just seemed to be trying to choke out Rhino, but Rhino go back up and mounted a short lived comeback. Angle got the upper hand in this match up with the inevitable Ankle Lock and Foley was screaming for Rhino to dig deep, and somehow, by some miracle managed to not be a factor at all. Rhino did however put on another great comeback and set up for a huge gore, but walked into an angle slam instead. Angle looked frustrated, and foley was itching to get back into the ring one more time. The Ref got gored out of his boots which was a nice touch, and Angle had this match sewn up completely. He went out to ringside and grabbed a chair, meanwhile Foley was in the ring to try and stop him from hitting Rhino with a chair, meanwhile Foley took over the ref’s job and counted a quick two count! He then kicked out the ref and took the full fledged ref’s spot for a good portion of the match up. Rhino was looking to be winning this one, especially now that Foley was the ref. Al Snow was there! Al Snow showed up! That’s right, AL FREAKIN SNOW! Angle took advantage of Foley being distracted by Snow, and Foley counted a three count after Angle hit Rhino in the head with a chair!
Sting, Booker T, Kevin Nash, Scott Steiner defeated Team 3-D, Samoa Joe, and Aj Styles
This was also convoluted. But easy to follow, meaning that the world title was on the line in this match; Sting’s team had to win to retain the belt for Sting, however if Styles’ team won, then Sting would lose the belt to Aj. Weird. Alright, this match was your basic tag team fair, nothing crazy, just everyone getting a shot to show what they had. These type of 8 man tag team matches rules the 1980’s wwf scene and I remember borrowing lots of “Best of WWF” tv compilation vhs tapes from my local video store, and that’s what this match reminded me of. It was an all around good match up, even though there were some spots that were a little long for my particular tastes. With so many fresh tags, no one looked to be so doing worse than the other, and overall this wasn’t half bad. I actually didn’t have a favorite going into this match up, but it was refreshing to see so many spots in such a match up. We saw some of the best moves from Team 3-D and even Nash got a few spots in this one. Dare I say, that Steiner looked good too! Overall not the worst match up in the world, even if it was a tag team match for the main event. This was almost as good as the main event of In Your House Canadian Stampede where The Hart Foundation went over big in the main event in a HUGE tag match. This thing turned into an all out brawl at the end, as it should, and things were really favoring the Main event mafia. Sting hit the scorpion death drop and pins joe for the win. The main event mafia win again!
Tna Final Resolution 2008 results
Cute Kip, Sonjay Dutt, Some Dude From The Motor City Machine Guns, BG James, Jay Lethal, Consequences Creeds, Curry Man, Hernandez, Homicide, Shark Boy wrestled in a Fest or Fired match.
Curry Man pulled Case #3
Homicide pulled Case #4
Jay Lethal pulled case #2
Hernandez pulled case #1
ODB, Roxxi, and Taylor Wilde defeated Sharmell and The Beautiful People
Eric Young defeated Sheik Abdul Bashir for the x-division championship
Christy Hemme defeated Awesome Kong via disqualification
Beer Money Inc defeated Matt Morgan & Abyss
Kurt Angle defeated Rhino
Mick Foley was the special guest enforcer
Sting, Booker T, Kevin Nash, Scott Steiner defeated Team 3-D, Samoa Joe, and Aj Styles
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