WWE Monday Night Raw 7/27/09 Results and Review Night of Shaq

WWE Monday Night Raw 7/27/09 Results

Mark Henry defeated Carlito in a beat the clock match (6:49)
Mickie James, Gail Kim, and Kelly Kelly defeated Beth Phoenix, Rosa Mendez, and Alicia Fox
MVP vs The Masterpiece Ended in a Double Countout
Kofi Kingston defeated The Brian Kendrick
Triple H vs Cody Rhodes Time Limit Failure
Hornswoggle defeated Chavo Guerrero in a Blind Fold Match
Evan Bourne defeated Jack Swagger in a beat the clock match (3:09)
John Cena defeated the Miz in a beat the clock match for the #1 contendership to Orton’s title at Summerslam
Cryme Tyme defeated Chris Jericho & Big Show with Shaq as special Enforcer via Disqualifcation

WWE Monday Night Raw 7/27/09 Review

Jerry Lawler introduced Shaq, and he came down and he’s so huge! The crowd was into it, so that was ok. Chris Jericho came down to the ring and stood up to Shaq, but got PWNED right away! Shaq called him Christina which was hilarious! The Big Show was introduced, and he was looking huge, and he was going to confront Shaq. Big Show got PWNED too, Shaq wasn’t having it; Shaq made a match with Cryme Tyme and the tag champions, and he’s going to be the outside enforcer!

Mark Henry defeated Carlito in a beat the clock match (6:49)

Apparently Beat the Clock is back in action. This match was all Henry. Carlito had no major chance in this match up. He was getting worked the whole time. Carlito tried to get offense in, but he was thwarted at every moment, Henry was no selling everything! Is Mark Henry the new Triple H? Maybe. Carlito tried his best, but it was not to be had. Mark Henry defeated Carlito with relative ease, then he tried to get the fans involved.

Mickie James, Gail Kim, and Kelly Kelly defeated Beth Phoenix, Rosa Mendez, and Alicia Fox

Gail Kim and Beth Phoenix started this match, and it was really cool. The two “divas” can still wrestle and I always appreciate that out of those two. However, in came the other girls, and it wasn’t the same. Gail Kim tried to make Rosa, and Alicia look good, but it wasn’t happening. Those two are going to injure someone. Mickie James couldn’t even make Alicia Fox look good, her timing is off, and it’s evident she’s not going to last a long time in the WWE…at least I hope not. Whatever the case is, this match did manage some great spots from Mickie James, and Gail Kim, as well as Beth Phoenix, so it wasn’t all for not.

Shaq and Cole w/ Hornswoggle had a cool segment back stage where Shaq made cole look dumb.

MVP vs The Masterpiece Ended in a Double Countout

The Masterpiece came out, which hasn’t been on television for a long time. He looks like he’s still on the juice, in case you were wondering. MVP had to win this match under six minutes, to get a title shot. MVP was all over Masters, trying to get this match with a quick pin, but it wasn’t working that well, Masters kept fighting back and even showed a surprise bit of athleticism mid match. MVP wasn’t lying down though, he seriously wants a title shot, so he was throwing everything at Masters, as fast as possible. The Masterpiece locked on the Masterlock on the outside, and wouldn’t let go, getting himself and MVP counted out! So Mark Henry’s time is still the top number to beat.

Kofi Kingston defeated The Brian Kendrick

The Brian Kendrick is done. This match was roughly 20 seconds long. He went out there and was yelling at Jerry Lawler, mid rant Kofi hit Trouble in Paradise and pinned Kendrick without even trying. Looks like Kendrick is done…it’s over.

Triple H vs Cody Rhodes Time Limit Failure

Backstage Ted Dibiase Jr hit Triple H’s leg with a lead pipe. Cody then went into this match and went for the attack, working on Triple H’s leg. He didn’t have to win this match, he just had to make sure Triple H didn’t win with record time. It was pretty much Cody until the two minute mark, when Triple H was trying to mount a comeback, but it wasn’t working to his favor. Ted Dibiase came down to distract Triple H, he resisted, but wasn’t able to win this one as time ran out as he was hitting Cody Rhodes with the pedigree. Triple H will NOT BE in the main event at Summerslam, YES!

Hornswoggle defeated Chavo Guerrero in a Blind Fold Match

Shades of Wrestlemania 7 were seen here. I remember being in attendance at WM7 and screaming my lungs out for Jake the snake to hit the DDT on Martel, great match. Chavo’s jobber status was definitely cemented here. Hornswoggle yet again got the better of the veteran wrestler, and this wasn’t even funny, as much as it was sad. The saddest point was definitely Chavo hitting, or trying to hit a Frog Splash with nobody there…Chavo is a good sport for going with this but it really sucks for him, former ECW Champion, Cruiserweight Champion, tag team champion…oh well. Hornswoggle wins again. It must be noted that only Chavo Guerrero was blind folded.

Evan Bourne defeated Jack Swagger in a beat the clock match (3:09)

This match was a cluster of high spots and reactions. It was obvious to me that Bourne was going to win all along. It was an easy win, Swagger played along and lost in about 3 minutes. There wasn’t a whole lot to this match up. It’s an interesting match up, but this one could be good with more time.

Maybe I’m missing something, but Bourne beat the clock by winning with three minutes or so…but I guess that doesn’t mean that he wins? I don’t know, he won the match but he didn’t beat the clock? I don’t know, this got confusing, an I just let it go.

John Cena defeated the Miz in a beat the clock match for the #1 contendership to Orton’s title at Summerslam

The Miz was not just losing this match like usual, he was trying to make this match last as long as possible. It seemed like a no brainer, and it was. Cena wasn’t losing, and he didn’t, now he faces Orton at Summerslam. A major reason NOT to get Summerslam for me; I’m not looking forward to that at all. Cena vs Orton? Lame. Miz got a raw deal again.

Cryme Tyme defeated Chris Jericho & Big Show with Shaq as special Enforcer via Disqualifcation

Big Show was dominant in this match. He was working over JTG throughout the opening and middle point of this match up. Jericho was tagged in and he continued the work that Big Show had started, and things were not looking good for Cryme Tyme, despite Shaq trying to motivate them. Shaq pushed Jericho, and was getting involved slightly on the outside every now and again, whenever he could squeeze in a little bit while the referee wasn’t looking. Big Show got himself disqualified.

Post match, Big Show called out Shaq. Big Show pushed Shaq, and Shaq kept trash talking so Show grabbed him by the neck! Shaq grabbed Show! The Crowd was going nuts, a Shoulder block later and Show was out of the ring, and I was marking out like a school girl…geez…I guess WWE got me, they got me. I liked it, I’m sorry folks, Shaq made that ending worthwhile, and Cole screaming BOOMSHAKALAKA really made my night. HAHAHA! Shaq on Raw wasn’t half bad, I liked it.

Well….maybe I didn’t like it all, but that was a good spot at the end, I thought it was cool. Jeremy Piven will be the host next week.