Tna Impact 7/16/09 Results
The Amazing Red defeated Samoa Joe via Disqualification
Suicide defeated Chris Sabin
Homicide defeated Suicide for the x-division championship
Sarita defeated Alissa Flash
Booker T & Kevin Nash & Scott Steiner defeated Beer Money & Aj Styles
Kurt Angle vs Sting in a six sides of steel match ended in a no contest
Tna Impact 7/16/09 Review
As usual Foley comes out to talk. I don’t want to hear Foley any longer, but here he is, random speech about getting the TNA belt back. He called out Kurt Angle, and the champion obliged by coming to the ring. Foley was rambling about last week’s Barbed Wire beat down. He then was complimenting Angle for being a great wrestler and that on Sunday he hopes no Main Event Mafia will show up to interfere in their match up. Sting came out and started to call out Kurt Angle. He started to rant about how Kurt and Mick are liars and that this weekend we’re going to see who has the power to run TNA. Sting will wrestle Kurt Angle tonight in a six sides of steel match!
Backstage Samoa Joe was beating the crap out of The Amazing Red, I hated that, but oh well.
The Amazing Red defeated Samoa Joe via Disqualification
Samoa Joe beat up Amazing Red, then threw Rudy Charles across the ring, Rudy Charles called for the bell, I assume he lost the match. This was dumb.
There was some random interview segment with all the knockouts talking about random trash with Don West. It was a stupid segment, made to waste time.
Suicide defeated Chris Sabin
The Motor City Machine Guns have the worst music in TNA wrestling history. I hate their music with a passion. It’s time for a change. Sabin finally got a shot at Suicide, but it was non title, so it didn’t even matter to me who won. Suicide sucks, I’ve never liked his character and I don’t know why he has a title, as it didn’t even help the TNA video game sales. This match was fast paced and back and forth. No one had the real upper hand, but Sabin was definitely standing out. However, for all Sabin’s effort, Suicide kept hitting sling shot maneuvers and reversals to try and slow down the tempo. These two were no selling everything for the sake of time constraints. Sabin has such great timing in there and it showed, until Suicide caught him with a sick rolling slam and then hit Alex Shelley on the outside. Sabin hit a sweet spike ddt but couldn’t pick up the win. The Suicide Solution was hit and this match was over. I still don’t like Suicide, and this match was just too fast, there wasn’t enough time to develop at all.
Post match the Motor City Machine Guns fought Suicide and mopped him up. They set up a sweet leg drop onto a chair, and Suicide was out cold. Homicide came down to ringside and saved Suicide, chasing away the Motor City Machine Guns.
Homicide then decided to cash in his briefcase for a shot at the X-Division title shot.
Homicide defeated Suicide for the x-division championship
Homicide immediately pinned Suicide and thought he could just win it. He didn’t, and Suicide fought back, but was obviously winded from his last attempt. Homicide hit the Gringo Killer and won the X-Division championship! Not much of a match, but I liked it, go Homicide!
Angelina Love was in a complete haz-mat suit as the Beautiful People came out to do some talking. Angelina Love was saying that she wasn’t ready last week. She also said that this weekend Tara and her would go for the gold! Then Tara came out and hit the Widows Peak on Angelina Love, playing more mind games for this Sundays match. It was an ok segment and I loved how the women weren’t “divas” or anything like that, they were wrestlers building an angle, a rarity in professional wrestling right now.
Sarita defeated Alissa Flash
What’s this? Two new wrestlers? Yeah, TNA is introducing two new knockouts, and yes they can wrestle! Flash had a strong style, building on heavy moves and punches while Sarita had a pure Lucha Libre style. Sarita was in there showing off for sure, within ten seconds there was a Suicide Dive! Talk about real women’s wrestling! YES! Flash capitalized on a mistake and started to dismantle Sarita like a technical wrestler. Meanwhile Sarita was sticking to just a pure lucha style, trying to get from high spot to high spot, but that proved dangerous as Flash kept catching Sarita with mistakes. Flash did a nice surboard set up to curb stomp, and it looked like Sarita’s debut was going to get spoiled. Flash’s overhead back suplex into the corner was brilliant, shades of Bret Hart! Sarita won with a victory roll after some good back and forth, and this match was really good, best match of the night, no doubt.
Booker T & Kevin Nash & Scott Steiner defeated Beer Money & Aj Styles
Beer Money has to be one of the longer running tag teams in professional wrestling right now. I hope they never split them up, they work too well together; unlike wwe’s way of splitting things up and then burying the legacy. So here were, a six man tag and it wasn’t half bad. Aj started things off with Scott Steiner and the two were putting on a decent show. The match turned into a melee with everyone fighting in ring, then outside. The two left standing were Nash and Aj Styles, but it was Nash that ended this thing early with a huge Jacknife Power Bomb. He ended Aj’s hopes of winning this match, as the rules seemed to spin and it was an elimination match all of a sudden. I hate when TNA does this, on the fly too, but I guess it makes the match a little longer. Steiner eliminated James Storm, and this match was now a three on one match with Robert Roode stuck in the match against three members of the main event mafia. Booker T hit a book end after the commercial, and it seemed like this match was going south for Robert Roode. Roode managed to eliminate Kevin Nash but after that Booker T and Scott Steiner kept hitting each other on accident and Roode capitalized. He had this match sewn up nicely even hitting a nice spinebuster on Booker T, but it wasn’t to be as the numbers game just kept growing. Roode hit an amazing bridge suplex on Booker T but Sharmell was on the ring apron distracting the ref, and it was downhill with the Main event Mafia pulling off another win.
Kurt Angle vs Sting in a six sides of steel match ended in a no contest
This match couldn't half more than 10 minutes to unfold so it was somewhat tame. Sting tried to out wrestle Kurt, but it wasn't going to happen as Kurt is a real amateur wrestler and it showed in the onset of this match, gaining an easy upper hand against Sting. Sting got back with a stiff elbow, and this match started to come undone with Sting reversing Angle's momentum at every turn.
Then we got hit with commercials?
The match now had roughly 5 minutes to finish before the next program, meaning TNA must've edited the crap out of this match to fit into the time slot.
Sting got a second wind after the break and was totally dominating Kurt Angle. He set up his moves and was throwing Angle at the walls of the cage, but nothing was working. Angle hit a release German Suplex and the tables turned for Angle. Angle went for the Angle Slam but it was reversed right into the Scorpion Death Lock.
Meanwhile at the announce table Samoa Joe knocked out Jeff Jarrett then walked into the cage and locked it again. Samoa Joe then got hit with a Scorpion Death Lock! The lights went out and Samoa Joe was in a choke hold!
At this point Foley and Jarrett were trying to get into the cage, but the Mafia was controlling things outside. This match was ridiculous, Sting was getting chocked out, the match was thrown out I guess? I don't know, what a convoluted mess.
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