WWE Monday Night Raw 05/18/09 Results
Kelly Kelly won The Divas Battle Royal
Santino defeated Chavo Guerrero
The Colons defeated Goldust & The Brian Kendrick
MVP defeated Matt Hardy
Vickie Guerrero defeated Santina in a Miss Wrestlemania match
Batista & John Cena defeated Legacy
WWE Monday Night Raw 05/18/09 Review
It’s good to be back home, and I’m sure all 3 of you readers missed a few reviews that were missed. I noticed that the site made no money while I was gone, and that’s fine, but I don’t know if I can get a TNA ppv this month as I’m broke now.
Randy Orton opened up the show. He started talking trash as usual….then who came out but the Retired Ric Flair. So much for that final send off, huh? I guess he’s back somehow. Flair announces that Orton’s next title defense will come inside a Steel Cage, so that he can’t get disqualified? Oh it’s one of those? The ones where the ref isn’t inside? Because when’s the last time we saw that happen?
Orton delivered one of the worst shots I’ve ever to Flair’s face. It was so ill-timed. Batista ran down after Legacy was starting to come down the stage, but the numbers game once again helped Orton and his crew of misfits gain control. John Cena came down for the save and the ring was cleared! This of course will lead to a tag match…I hate tag matches that don’t involve two “tag teams” alone. But such is life sometimes, huh?
Kelly Kelly won The Divas Battle Royal
Alright, the divas were piled into a Divas Battle Royal. I didn’t want to see any of this, I don’t like the divas at all, it’s a big tease at this point with little to no wrestling prowess at all. Kelly Kelly’s elimination of Beth Phoenix might cause her to start a feud of sorts. Maryse sprayed Mickie James in the face with some perfume or something, and Kelly Kelly wins this match up! Whatever….I don’t care. “Holla…Holla….” Man that music sucks.
Santino defeated Chavo Guerrero
How do you make Chavo look like a good wrestler, or make it seem like he’s still a relevant superstar for the wwe? Have him wrestle Santino, in a hilarious match where he stomps out Santino at every move. Then again, Santino randomly “hulked” up, I kid you not, that being said, Santino was the accidental technical wrestler, ducking and diving his way to a win! So my plot to call out WWE conspiracies to make Chavo good again…backfired because Santino stole one here.
Chavo then got on the mic and said that Santina would have to defend her Wrestlemania diva’s title or whatever against Vickie later tonight. I dreaded hearing this lame announcement…lame.
The Colons defeated Goldust & The Brian Kendrick
Once again, Goldust is thrown into an unlikely tag team partnership. Remember, previously, Goldust was great with the likes of Booker T! Remember that? He also had short lived partnership with The Blue Meanie, and others. Goldust is great as a comedy act and it’s interesting to see him in this match with Brian Kendrick, but I wasn’t sure if this thing was going to carry over into something more, especially when The Colons’ were delivering like the best tag team in the world! The two are amazing in ring together, and I hope that the WWE doesn’t split them into a “brother vs brother” feud. Kendrick lost this one and he’s on a major losing streak. He then yelled at Goldust and provoked him to fight him. I hope Goldust has a third or fourth coming here, Dustin should just be glad that he has a job right now.
Hornswoggle came into the ring and fought Kendrick with the help of Goldust, forming a very unlikely partnership. Why not? Goldy and Horny? I’m tired.
The Miz came down to ringside and talked about how he beat Cena. He was also dressed like Cena, making for a hilarious moment in time. The King came into the ring and started calling out wrestlers to compare The Miz’s victory over John Cena to logic. It was hilarious, and a part of me really wanted Batista to come out at King’s call and beat him up, it would’ve been awesome.
The Big Show came down to ring side and beat up The Miz, which was interesting…in that The Big Show just killed The Miz.
MVP defeated Matt Hardy
MVP is really BALLIN! He’s got me saying that at random locations, signals and all! I was in the sports section at the Supermarket, and I was “BALLIN” with anything ball shaped! It was fun. I can’t really avoid it, it’s impulsive; try it, it makes you feel better. MVP and Hardy are familiar opponents and they put on a good match up, with Hardy pretending that his arm was really broken, and after the random spots, the inevitable happened, MVP pinned Matt Hardy and it was all over. MVP wins again, proving that he’s still BALLIN!
Santino’s backstage antics were great. But the lead in was Chavo on the floor with Vickie on a chair…it looked really awkward. I don’t want to say incest…but my wheels aer turning.
Vickie Guerrero defeated Santina in a Miss Wrestlemania match
This match was dumb. Santina got beat up by William Regal, and of course that should’ve garnered disqualification…however, they turned this into a no dq match midway through.
Batista & John Cena defeated Legacy
I’m not sure how many times we’ve seen this, but I feel that this is just boring. We see this too often, handicap match with the faces looking great. So if you’ve seen any major previous match featuring the top faces in the game, you probably saw this match. I have a feeling that this match is at the house shows, but whatever the case maybe, Legacy was actually doing a good job holding their own midway through the match up. They just seemed like a well oiled machine, and why not? They are truly gaining on the “legacy” of The Four Horseman at this point. They have some more major title’s to go, but overall it’s getting good, seriously good. Things were falling apart until Ric Flair came down and lent an assist to the good guys, and Batista gets the pin on Orton!
Flair never retires…lame.
I’m tired, that’s it folks. I’ll be back tomorrow with ECW’s show review…enjoy.
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