Friday, July 18, 2008

TNA Impact Review 7/17/08 Why Sting Why

I’m not a big fan of the titles before the show, but whatever, I pretend I didn’t see them. Impact promises a lot of good action, but promises from TNA are not worth a whole lot.

Backstage Segment 1:

Booker T arrives with the world title belt on his shoulders.

In Ring Segment 1:

Booker T comes out to the ring and talks about how awesome he is and how great it is to finally be the champion. Right before he talks about the whole PPV ending, Jim Cornette comes out and declares Samoa Joe the world tna champion. Cornette then orders Booker T to hand over the belt.

Samoa Joe comes out dressed in a suit. He looks good, nice job TNA, too bad I didn’t expect him to come out like that. Maybe this is just a move to hide that people believe he’s too fat to be a main eventer. I have no problem with it though.

Joe talks about how he beat the crap out of Booker T in his home town, and how he’s going to do it again. However, he is going to allow Booker to hold onto the belt, citing that he’s no chump. Samoa Joe says that Booker T can’t win, and that he’s going to beat down sting too!


Backstage Segment 2:

Beer Money is back stage. Robert Roode talks about how it’s not funny that they lost, and that they are going to have revenge on LAX, and the rest of the park; considering that TNA is filmed at Universal Studios Florida.


Backstage Segment 3:

JB interviews Kaz and he talks about how he didn’t let anyone in TNA down. He thinks that tonight things are going to change.

Petey Williams (C) defeated Kaz

The X-Division is usually really good. They are top notch cruiserweights, but this match was way too short. It was basically a squash; It was about 1/3 of the length of a good match. Kaz looks to have the upper hand, but loses with a roll up and a hook of the tights. What a waste, these guys could really go, but TNA didn’t let the match develop into anything more than a glorified squash.

What annoyed me most, was not so much that they just threw a squash match in there for the TNA X-Division title, it was the fact that right after the match Kaz looked really pissed but instead of following up on that, they cut to the back and had a interview lined up. Wasting what could have developed into something interesting for the fans and the character. Oh well…TNA doesn’t know what they have on their hands, that’s for sure.

Backstage Segment 4:

JB waits for Petey Williams, and some random idiot comes in and tells JB that he has some top secret stuff for later. Lame.

Backstage Segment 5:

Samoa Joe is backstage with JB, and in comes Nash. Kevin Nash tells Samoa Joe that he’s the greatest in the game. Samoa admits that he might not be able to beat Booker T and looks weak. Nash tries to cheer him up a little, but Joe isn’t buying it. Nash says that if someone doesn’t believe in themselves, they have nothing left.

Backstage Segment 6:

Beer Money is back in the production booth whipping everyone, including the crew and the camera man.

Backstage Segment 7:

The announcers are saying that Sting has arrived. But it’s not Sting. It’s Kurt Angle and Team 3-D coming out of a limo.

Meanwhile, backstage Curry Man and others are in a meeting. Super Eric, Curry Man and Shark Boy argue some more, and Beer Money comes out and starts whipping them to pieces!


In Ring Segment 2:

Christy Hemme is out and the Rock & Rave connection is going to be in full effect. *Editors note: Christy Hemme might have a huge forehead, but she’s still a firecracker, and still somewhat attractive. I like her. Remember the Playboy cover and photo shoot? The WWE Playboy curse lives!

The Blueprint: Matt Morgan defeated. Jimmy Rave

Matt Morgan sucks. However, he beats the crap out of Jimmy Rave in a few moves. Nothing worth mentioning more than that; Jimmy Rave had no chance.

Then out comes Lance Rock.

The Blueprint: Matt Morgan defeated. Lance Rock

Lance Rock gets killed in another squash match. Lance Rock tried to get some offense in, but Morgan basically had full range to do whatever he wanted. This is definitely a long step away from his old gimmick, that’s for sure.

Backstage Segment 8:

The TNA Knockouts start arguing back stage about some random B.S. Jim Cornette can’t get anyone to shut up. JB comes in to try and help, and Cornette talks about how everyone wants a shot at Taylor for the knockouts belt. He announces a ten girl gauntlet match, and the winner will get a title shot at Taylor next week at impact. Some random girl offers special services to Cornette….and go to commercial.

Backstage Segment 9:

Beer Money is in the park and is beating down security. They start whipping the crap out of the security guards at the gate. Fans start booing, and then they threaten to whip the fans outside.

Seriously, someone beat down Don West again. Mike Tenay also, he’s fallen far away from his “professor” status that he u sed to have.


In Ring Segment 3:

Team 3-D and Kurt Angle come down to the ring, and he claims he talked to Sting. He knows why he hit Kurt Angle with a baseball bat, and Angle gets interrupted…

Aj Styles, Christian Cage, Rhino comes out and Styles says that Sting has his reasons and that he’s out there to talk to them about something important.

Team 3-D talks about how they want a six man table match.

Christian Cage takes the mic and says that his glass table bump was the worst pain he’s ever felt in his life. (Man he is lying dude) He says that he doesn’t take orders, and starts making fun of how fat Bubba Ray Is. He says that the match is not going to take place on PPV and that the match is going to take place on Impact and that it’s going to be a six man table elimination match.


#1 Contender’s Match: The Knockout Gauntlet

The women put on a great show in this match up, and I was really enjoying the pile up of women. I was confused about the rules of the match, but in the end, some hot blonde one. Velvet Sky is her name, and she is not half bad. She was taking bumps, alongside the rest of the women. I’m surprised Awesome Kong wasn’t involved somehow, but this was a good match with a lot of spots.

Once again, I’ll say that WWE DIVAS suck in comparison to what these women are doing in TNA.

Backstage Segment 10:

Booker T talks about how he is going to give an unlikely opponent a chance. He will wrestle Consequences Creed for the world TNA championship. The match tonight will be a stretcher match and Booker T (In his King tone) calls 911 and asks for an ambulance. He will be like Rocky, where Apollo Creed gave Rocky a title shot.

Backstage Segment 11:

Jay Lethal talks about how Sonjay Dutt was part of the family. So Cal Val says he’s being too hard on him and walks away.

Sonjay Dutt defeated Johnny Devine and Eric Young

This match was too fast, and was just a squash. I really didn't like this one and felt that it was just rushed and was wasted. It could have been a worthwhile match up on TNA but I guess it just wasn't meant to be.

Jay Lethal comes out to beat down Sonjay Dutt, and inadvertently hits him with a chair, causing So Cal Val to leave him once again. Is Val hooking up with Sonjay?

Backstage Segment 12:

Beer Money is walking, and says they could get fired for all they care.

In Ring Segment 4:

Beer Money comes out, and starts whipping a fan out of the audience. Then they turn their attentions to Hector Guerrero. They handcuff him to the ring post and then go to town on him. LAX comes out and saves him.

Backstage Segment 13:

Kurt Angle and his crew are sitting in their locker room and start talking trash about next week’s match up with Christian Cage and his crew of goons. They then say that Sting will be there and in their corner for the match.

Backstage Segment 14:

Consequences Creed is dancing and raving, cutting the promo of his life! He’s dressed up as Apollo Creed and says he’s going to make history tonight on Impact!

Booker T defeated Consequences Creed (stretcher match)

I admit, I marked out huge for this match, and I knew that there was no chance Creed was going to win, but I marked out huge. Creed impressed me a few weeks back when he wrestled AJ Styles, and I had confidence that he could hang in there with Booker T. Booker hasn’t been really good since I saw him in WCW against the likes of Chris Benoit and others with the television title that he was defending like a real champ. Creed got in little offense, and Booker let him do some impressive spots, even though he isn’t a main eventer. Don west really tore the chances of Creed winning up by saying that no matter what you are, you aren’t Booker T and won’t win. The Ax kick was impressive, I loved that, and it was all downhill from that point. The end came with Booker T just beating the crap out of creed and rolling him out to an ambulance waiting outside. A really lackluster ending to what could have been a really great match.

Samoa Joe comes out and beats the crap out of him, then throws Booker into the back of the ambulance, and then the ambulance leaves, leaving Samoa Joe and Sharmell alone!

TNA Impact 7/17/2008 Quick Results:

X Division Champion Petey Williams defeated Kaz
The Blueprint Matt Morgan defeated Johnny Devine
The Blueprint Matt Morgan defeated Lance Rock
Velvet Sky won a #1 Contender’s Match and will go on to face the Knockout Champion next week on Impact
Sonjay Dutt defeated Eric Young and Johnny Devine in a 3 Way Dance
Booker T. defeated Consequences Creed in a stretcher match


What turned out to be a cool show, really was light on the wrestling. I've denoted the amount of backstage segments via numbers, and will continue to do so for WWE as well. There wasn't a lot of wrestling on this show, but they were really trying to build up the story lines. I would have preferred longer matches though.

I do recall WCW Thunder having a LOT of matches in a 2 hour program, and I remember Nitro had a TON of wrestling for 2 and 3 hours. Sure they built story lines, but they didn't have Segment followed by Segment, they would mix it up better. I wonder what TNA is thinking?

I do think that they are having logic problems on this show. Christian Cage says that the worst pain ever was going through the glass table...that wasn't even real! I know...wrestling is fake, but this glass spot was even more fake.

Here's a clip of that for you guys:



FAIL.

This show was actually really good, and I liked it for the most part. I know that a lot of people do not appreciate TNA lately, and the podcast crews are dogging it, but this show was a nice alternative at times to WWE. Sure, it's not the greatest show in the world, but it wasn't complete garbage. I suggest everyone check out TNA if not for the countless backstage segments, then for the Knockout Division, I'm simply floored by what TNA is doing with them.

So far this week, TNA IMPACT is the best wrestling show so far. Will Smackdown top it? I'll have to wait and see. CMLL might be good on Sunday though...we'll see if Seattle, Wa. can give me some Galavision...I'm looking for it.

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